Having not the best day...

Since when I had I good day...
It all seems to be clouded in grey for past 2 weeks or so, just school, home, driving lessons and badminton or swimming if I bothered. Nothing really remarkable has happened. Days flow by as strangers you meet in the street while trying not to bump into them.

For weeks now I have felt that I'm left alone, no one bugging me to do everything, or anything. I have freedom to do anything, but I rarely use it... don't know why... Seems when you have it all in front of you, you stop caring and let the river flow. Should I do it or not...

It's like believing in something that has 0.000001% to come true, just to be sure you just wait till you are gray as weekdays, never having any fun while others are out having good times with eachother, you just sit and wait till your time comes. I sould be more active, but when I'm tired I can't be active... the energy, the will to go on... is fading piece by boring piece into the past, where nothing comes, but everything goes to there.

Once in a while I even bothered to write... achievement from me? ... don't know... no one really bothers to read it anyway...